Posted by: amica | January 4, 2010

Beginning a New Year with Old Stuff

M had his psych testing a couple of weeks ago and H has hers tomorrow. Not sure how long I must wait to get the results but I am very interested to see what they are. So much improvement with M in the last couple of months. One day, at the park, some of his classmates were there playing basketball. M joined them and I watched as he played, interacted, laughed, and had a great time. Not once did he try to control the game or bully anyone. It was wonderful to see. He still has obvious (to me) problems: trying to parent his siblings, doing everything half-ass, moaning and complaining about anything that is asked of him, taking things apart, etc. But these are things I see as minor in comparison to the past. I know things could change in a moment but I am loving this now.

H. What to say? She was watching a show yesterday and I could see her and the TV through the pass through in the kitchen. As soon as the commercial came on, she comes in to me and tells me about how her friend……the story she told me was what had just happened on the show. She wanted me to think her friend had experienced it, not the show. This is just an example of our all days, every days. We are working on owning our actions. If I say, the milk is still on the kitchen table, H will sigh heavily and say, “I’ll put it up,” as though she is doing me a favor. I will say H, you left the milk out so you should take responsibility for that. Say, Oh I forgot to put it up, I will do that now. Once again, this is an example of a constant occurence. She told the kids at school that I am a stripper and I take her to work with me. She tells the babysitter that I am tired because boys spend the night. She tells people about the dead people she sees and is extremely passive/aggressive with her anger. No one knows she is mad at them until she does something to them, under the radar. Yesterday she was jumping on M and bothering him in the backyard. I saw this and got on her about the touching. She continued to do things to make him mad. Finally, ding ding ding! my lightbulb went off and I called her over. H, why are you mad at M? She began to give me that incredulous look that she doesn’t know what I am talking about. So I, in return, gave her the don’t even go there look. So she told me and I instructed her to go use her words. Later on, something else happened between the two – she started it but ended up getting hurt herself. I said she needed to go read in her room. Not 5 seconds later, she comes out saying her music player is broken and she let M use it and now a piece is missing. I had a hunch so I told her I had just seen it working so it must have just happened. Go look around your room really well. Another adult was there and looked at me strangely. I said, just wait a minute. As expected, here she comes saying she found it. She had tried to make me think it was M but I knew she was still mad at him. This is constant – did I mention that???

So things are good for the most part but I will confess, my energy levels need a boost from the constant refereeing and mind reading and foretelling of the future.

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Responses

  1. There’s never a chance to just hit the “off” button is there? I could use one myself.

  2. omg, she told people you were a stripper…. oh man, excuse me for giggling….. so sorry…. I would have nightmares…..
    YES, mind reading and future telling are exhausting! I know! Just keeping up with the new incoming crap is tiring, let alone the future crap and past crap. UGH! You are doing a great job keeping it all up!


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